The Brooklyn Rail

SEPT 2019

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SEPT 2019 Issue
Critics Page

"WRONG? ME?"

WRONG? Me? Like Marianne Moore (she loved baseball)
I couldn’t possibly do anything lacking in merit, credibility, honor.

Just ask Brian O’Doherty or John Yau. They know!!! I invited
Barry Schwabsky for bagels and coffee to talk it out but he’s in Berlin.

Maybe Oscar Wilde is ready to reveal? W. H. Auden? A Rake’s Progress!
Did you know Truman Capote detested Duchamp’s art? Faux Pas.
Baudelaire, I’m sure, has more to say about Color and Delacroix.

You’ve contacted Frank O’Hara? Does he remember his feelings?
Did John Ruskin leave his marbles in Venice or what? Immanuel Kant?

Please do NOT ask Adrian Piper about anything!
Cady Noland does not want to hear from you either.

Have you queried Clement Greenberg on how Lee Krasner cooked those steaks on Springs Fireplace Road? Rare? Medium Rare? WELL DONE!!!

If you do contact my art mother, Jill Johnston, PLEASE don’t say my name.
Have you read her book on Jasper Johns? Is her argument plausible? Have you seen the Grünewald Altarpiece? Don’t tell the Europeans I said so but, honestly, it’s like the Sistine Chapel. A cartoon without Tom & Jerry!!

OK. I admit it was probably WRONG of me to stalk Wally Shawn.
But he just kept popping up! NoHo Star. Fourth Avenue. Chelsea.
Across the aisle at Janáček. Gristede’s. Halloween at Don Giovanni’s.

Was I wrong not to visit Mary Boone in prison? Ask Alec Baldwin!
Ask Ross Bleckner #METOO (for men hired as ‘artist assistants’).

I’ve got it! Susan Sontag! She’s the one!
I saw her at the Met. Annie was in the so-called “Ladies” Room ;).
Cocteau’s Parade was up. I asked Susan what they did about the sets.
With her usual self-importance and patronizing air she deigned to inform me that she had already seen this production at its premiere in 1981 and that the ‘problem’ was solved by “repainting” the Picassos.

Imagine my surprise, minutes later, when the curtain opened on a stage strewn with David Hockneys! When you can’t tell one over-hyped, over-rated, mediocre guy from another?

How WRONG is that?

Contributor

Laura Cottingham

Laura Cottingham is an artist, critic and author who lives in New York. For the past few years she has been traveling extensively in Egypt. She is currently working on a group of Energy Field Paintings in the Hippie Minimalist Tradition.

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The Brooklyn Rail

SEPT 2019

All Issues